JenLa

Crazy *
I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind
There was something so pleasant about that place.
Even your emotions have an echo
And so much space

And when you’re out there
Without care,
Yeah, I was out of touch
But it wasn’t because I didn’t know enough
I just knew too much

Does that make me crazy
Does that make me crazy
Does that make me crazy
Possibly

Go ahead, witness my fall from grace.. I was going to make excuses-like how I was only teaching it. I gave up hooking years ago. But the thing is, Pixie brought this book with her. There was a particular dress she wanted to crochet and as I was looking through the book, I realized that crochet designs have really improved recently. Then I went so far as to admire some designs in Stitch ‘N Bitch Crochet, the Happy Hooker. Yes, admired. Unfortunately it doesn’t stop there. On the way home I made a trip to the book store to buy the Happy Hooker. Now my first inclination is to lie. I’d like to say that the feeling passed quickly. But it didn’t and so I took inventory of my crochet needles. (I’m missing two sizes from my set, BTW.) And when I started this post, I had a sentence here saying that since I hadn’t actually done any crochet projects myself, that there was hope for salvation. Except that was a couple days ago and today? Today is 06-06-06 and…….

Well, now we have this:

That would be the “big bottomed bag” from Happy Hooker. You will find that the Evil is complete when I tell you that it’s made from mercerized cotton. (a.k.a. asserized cotton) The devil is in the details, you know. Possibly this all started with Alltel, because they gave me a phone number that ended in 666. Well, ok, truth be told the lady said “Uh. Oh. Um. Well, we can change this but your number is….” And I laughed maniacally and said I’d keep the number. Obviously I was marked from early on, so it’s not my fault. Still. You cannot deny the bag’s cuteness. No you can’t-can you? I thought not. And you may say to yourself, “Yeah, but it doesn’t make me want to crochet.” And I say to you, “We’ll see about that.” Muhwahahahahahahahaha!!!

Pixie and I were not the only ones crocheting (which I prefer to pronounce CROTCHetting) at SnB. Claudia was teaching Jenny to do a crochet edging, too. And Ann was backing me up with everything I had to say about crochet and Amanda mentioned hey, maybe she’d like to learn, too. Evil is just a point of view, doncha know?

Look, crotchetting has been coming for a few years now. Remember that insert in IK that was about their crochet mag and how mad we all were about that? I didn’t invent it, it’s not my fault. Certainly the Prince of Darkness is to blame here. It could be worse, I mean I could turn this into a macrame blog. “Knottygirls” would still work so DON’T MESS WITH ME. Or Beelzebub, my apparent paramour. Well look at me, I turn into a hooker and all of a sudden I think I’m so big. At least there’s likker in hell. And miles and miles of asserised cotton and acrylic, no doubt.

Jen’s Tip of the Day: If your neighbor says he’s coming to your house to “fluff your hay”, it’s not some kind of euphemism and there is no need for candles and wine. It literally means “fluffing your hay” so it can be baled. I thought you might want to know that ahead of time, to avoid any potentially awkward moments.
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**Gnarls Barkley would totally approve of me quoting the lyrics on my Knitting/CROCHETING Blog.