JenLa

I have a Finished Object! I mean for real, this time, as in BOTH socks are done. Here’s what they look like:

That’s what I made the Ed Yarn into. It has cat’s paw lace and cat’s face lace. I made the cat face up myself. It’s a little more…. cutsie…. than is usual for me, but I think Ed would appreciate the weirdness of it.

Specs:
Yarn: Knitpicks Dye Your Own, dyed by La to commemorate my pink and orange cat, Edward
Needles: US 3 [3.25 mm] double pointed aluminum
Pattern: My own. Toe-up, wrapped short rows, sewn bind off
Gauge: 7.5 sts/inch
Comments: Fastest pair of socks I ever knit. I started swatching them on Friday and finished the pair on Monday. Also, I really like this knitpicks yarn; it has good stretch and is a great weight for socks. There is also a lot of it as these socks come well up my calves and there is still a good amount of yarn left over.

And now for some garden porn. Gorn?
Gardenia
Yellow Squash
Cucumbers
Yellow Grape Tomatoes

I can’t think of any smartass remarks to make today. I must be coming down with something.

Now that summer is here, I often find myself looking back at the summers of my childhood. So, of course, I’d like to plagiarize an email my SIL sent to me recently that sums it all up perfectly!

WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!

This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever!  The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas.  We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all!

Kind of makes you want to run through the house with scissors, now doesn’t it?!

I don’t know if you remember me getting that Breach of Land Use Covenant back in…..April? The one where I was going to get a big penalty and my property taxes would go up dramatically because I wasn’t actually farming the land? Yeah so I worked really hard to write a proposal up for the tax commissioner’s office by the deadline and I have yet to hear anything back. I was told two weeks. So I should have known for at least three weeks now. But in the mad race to get some kind of fiber bearing animal on this property we fenced in a smallish goat pen, of which I have shown you pictures. What I hadn’t told you was that I found a small herd of Angora Goats in TX that I’m trying to buy.

Now Texas and I have never gotten along. I got a speeding ticket there, and now I’m on probation. PROBATION. For a speeding ticket. For two years. And if I recall TX also gave me the flu. It put big nasty Texas flies in my husband’s car that stayed for three states. And also, my husband’s car broke down in Oklahoma which means obviously whatever was wrong with it happened in Texas and just took until Oklahoma to manifest. So if you thought I was feeling a little wary of these Texas goats, you’d be right. But there are 6 of them (3 bucks-1 is red-2 does and a buckling) and the shears and 2 LVG dogs for $700. (don’t want the dogs) Which is nothing. Maybe Texas has its uses. Even with health certificates and transportation it’s still a good deal. So I decided I’m going for it and I emailed the seller to ask her for pictures of them and for things like their names and relationships, etc. I may be reading too much into her reply but I swear I detected a note of mockery when she informed me “They don’t have names. They’re livestock.” And it made me a little huffy. Ok, it made me a lot huffy. Texas strikes again. This is a cue for Norma to comment telling me what a dumbass I am for wanting to name my livestock. Which are probably rabid.

So I’ve told everyone who will listen about it and everyone has said “you can name them if you want to, screw her.” And that made me feel somewhat vindicated. I could see if I was going to eat them that not naming them might be preferable. I’m not going to eat them though. I’m going to feed them and care for them and shave them. Hell I’ve had marriages based on no more than that and my husbands have all had names. (yes, hey you is a name.) Do you think I’m being overly sentimental?

Maybe once this deal is finalized I’ll have a contest to name a few of them. There will be parameters, though. I mean we do have a theme planned for the farm. Also, does anyone out there know the maximum age for wethering a goat? I could call my vet but I prefer to solicit the non-professional opinions of anonymous knitters whenever possible.

And since we’re on the subject, go see another brand new livestock who is getting named today! And we should be able to welcome yet another very very soon. Too exciting! I’m so jealous.

Happy Memorial Day and an enormous thank you to all who have served or are serving this country!

My mom had her first chemo treatment on Weds. Everything went well. They decided to get her radiation going on what little is left of the spinal tumor and she only has to have 10 of those treatments (hallelujah~!) but in order to do both chemo and radiation at the same time, they’ve put her on lower doses of chemo. Instead of one big one every 3 weeks, we do one smaller one every week until radiation is finished, then back to the normal. She’s handling the drugs well and is even getting around to do errands and such. She has informed the doctors that 15 months is not enough, she intends to live for 15 years and they can get ready to rewrite the textbooks. So her morale is improving as well. She may even come visit me this weekend for the first time since the holidays. She’s just going crazy to get out of her cage, I think. Chemotherapy is an interesting thing. I mean from every perspective. And there’s a whole culture revolving around it, too. I may have to write some of it down someday.

Itgirl had a post about reading cheesy teenage angst novels and because that is SO COOL we decided to co-host a “book club” revolving around it. We’re calling it the Awesome Angst Along. It’ll be just like all those After School Specials. I’m still setting up the blog for it. I’m having trouble finding a template that’s angsty enough. But soon we’ll have something up and will direct you to it should you want to join us. Here are some of the rules:
1. Books should cost no more than $1.50. If you choose to spend more on said books, that’s up to you, but we’re looking at books that are readily available on places like Amazon or used bookstores for less than a dollar.

2. We’ll start with a list of 4 or 5 books. You can read all or one or as many as you want. We want suggestions for other books. This is interactive.

3. Feel free to share books amongst yourselves. People shouldn’t get hosed or clusterfucked or anything, but if you’re done with that book and want to send it to someone else, please do.

So who wants in? We should be emailing invites to interested parties in the next few days, providing I can get more than 18 consecutive minutes to work on it. 18 consecutive sober minutes. And don’t worry, we’re flexible and there’s no pressure when you join. And this has little to nothing to do with knitting, you just have to enjoy stories with deep teenaged meaning, strong messages about what’s truly important in life and HOPE. LOTS OF HOPE!!

And now…photos! I’ve been told that most people like those. I’ve even heard reports that blogs with photos are more popular than those with just words.

That is yarn. You may remember it, I hardly do. But that’s no ordinary yarn. No, that is yarn that La dyed especially for me to commemorate my beloved and much missed Ed. The hub and I described Ed as “orange and pink” and hub referred to him as “Pinkman”. You can bet your sweet ass I’m going to do something special with this. Your ass is sweet, isn’t it? Good.

The yarn did not travel alone, oh no. It came accompanied by girly bath things (I have a very girly bathroom, with pink swirl glass accessories, a floral embroidered shower curtain, girly rugs and pink rhinestone shower curtain rings. NO BOYS ALLOWED.) Flower post-it notes. (Oh how I love the sticky notes. I have flower reminders all over my house even now.) A clear green chibi, sleepy tea, a starter herd including a sheep and a cow. And an orange striped kitty to replace the one I lost. Because my husband is mean and hates me and won’t let me get another real one.

Also seen in that picture, on the lower right? A finished Maze sock. Did you hear me? I said a FINISHED Maze sock! The first person to mention that one sock does not qualify as an FO dies. In my life at this time, one finished anything is an FO. I’m even counting wound balls as FO’s at this point. So chemo is good for something anyway. Like knitting time. Oh and also for treating cancer.

Yes, that is all of my pictures for today. I don’t want to spoil you. See you at the Awesome Angst Along. Or you know, here.

First of all I want to thank you all for your heartfelt condolences regarding my loss of Moze. The outpouring has made his passing a little easier, and has hastened me on the healing process, and your stories of shared love and shared loss have touched my heart. Thank you all so much.

Finally….finally I’ve got some good news. Hey, are you all ready for this?

Are you sure?

Ok, I’ll tell you then. THE DH GOT A JOB! Monday he started working here. They came through with an offer on Friday, just hours after we got back from the vet. Fate…she’s Satan’s sadistic cuntywhore alright.

Oh! And remember when I was knitting Rhapsody for the DH, and called it his I-have-faith-that-he’ll-get-a-job-and-the-office-will-be-so-cold-tht-he-needs-a-good-sweater, sweater? No? Well, pretend you do, k? Careful what you wish for. This morning, he took Rhapsody with him, complaining that they keep the A/C WAAAAY cold. Ain’t that some shit?

And if that wasn’t enough (believe me, it isn’t), today, my boss Jass (short for Jackass), finally stepped up to the plate and made me a decent offer to stay. I guess it took scaring the shit out of him by looking for a new job to get him to realize I’m indespensible and to suck it up, grow a pair, and start paying me close to what I’m worth. I got a big fat raise, 5 extra days of vacation and a monthly health care subsidy.

But Fate, if you think this makes us square, I’ve got news for you. With all the shit you put me through the last 6 months? Puleeeze! Bitch, we aren’t even in the same vicinity as square! Tell you what, throw a couple of lottery jackpots my way, let me strike oil on my property, miraculously have Sassy start pooping IN the litterbox again (poor old thing, she lost her best friend too), end this whole peri-menopausal shit, and a few other lucky breaks of your choosing, and then we’ll talk about square… capisce?